Standing on My Knees
by John Olive

THE STORY: Catherine, a young and promising poet affected with schizophrenia, returns home to her cluttered apartment after a stay in the hospital.

Urged on by her publisher she struggles to pursue her art, but the very intensity of thought that this demands brings on her attacks and the imaginary voices that bedevil her.

At a party she meets Robert, a young stockbroker, and as their relationship deepens she relies ever more heavily on Thorazine pills to control her illness and maintain a semblance of normalcy.

Ironically, while the pills block her “voices” they also stifle her creative impulses and the talent that has brought her the most joy.

Trying to handle both her relationship with Robert and her needs as an artist she cuts down on the Thorazine doses, but as her illness again becomes apparent Robert backs away.

In the end Catherine, in a shattering scene, scatters the pills on the floor, and facing the inevitable truth that she can be only one person and not two, slips inexorably back into madness.