Getting To Know the Natives
by Daniel Frank Turner

Getting To Know the Natives Book Cover — Getting To Know the Natives Cover

Highlights

Female

Male

90 mins Present Day Interior Set Contemporary Costumes/Street Clothes Comedy

Synopsis

The story of Jarlath Breen, an ex-Olympic swimmer, who spends his days in a bathtub and his nights on a water bed, and Carita, his wife, who sells herself as real estate, who decided to end their lives.

Their attempt at suicide is interrupted by Clement Rose, an anthropologist, and his wife, Misty, a social worker.

Misty attempts to save Jarlath from suicide through baptism and sex, but ends by drowning him in the bathtub before eventually marrying him in the coffin.

The funeral guest arrives and reveals that he has had an affair with both Carita and Jarlath.

Everyone ends up in the bathtub in this happy commingling of the festive and macabre.

Characters

Character	Gender	Age	Description
JARLATH BREEN An athlete who holds the world's bathtub record	—	—	An athlete who holds the world's bathtub record
CARITA BREEN His wife who sells real estate--that does not exist	female	—	His wife who sells real estate--that does not exist
CLEMENT ROSE An anthropologist and man of the world, nothing affects him deeply	male	—	An anthropologist and man of the world, nothing affects him deeply
MISTY ROSE His wife, a sociologist and homemaker who starts homemaking	female	—	His wife, a sociologist and homemaker who starts homemaking
THE VISITOR BUD KING - Sells sailboats for life insurance	male	—	BUD KING - Sells sailboats for life insurance
MR. FLOOP A guest at two funerals	male	—	A guest at two funerals
GRANDFATHER Older than Socrates and man of the hour	male	—	Older than Socrates and man of the hour