Beauty Parade
by Conrad Seiler

THE STORY: After rounding up the mothers of our beauty contestants, who have been backstage giving their daughters last-minute encouragement, a young Master of Ceremonies sends them to their seats.

He explains to the audience the kind of contest he is staging for the Super Association for Supermarkets.

In this contest both beauty and brains will be judged to select the Supermarket Queen.

The five contestants, the Misses “Canned Corn,” “Pretzels,” “Prunes”, “Skim Milk” and “Upside-down Cake,” parade before the judges.

Then to prove the girls have more than beauty, the M.C. quizzes them about such diverse matters as marriage, their ideal man, the political state of Europe and Einstein's Theory of Relativity.

Etheleene Hudkins, “Miss Prunes,” is crowned, the angry mothers of the losing contestants swarm the stage and send the M.C. and the judges fleeing every which way.