This is Not What I Ordered
by Stephen Fife

This is Not What I Ordered Book Cover — This is Not What I Ordered Cover

Highlights

Female

Male

90 mins Present Day Expandable Casting Interior Set Contemporary Costumes/Street Clothes Comedy

Synopsis

Ever walked into a restaurant and seen an attractive couple in the back talking excitedly, their hands gesturing wildly, their expressions changing swiftly from joy to sadness and back again?

Ever wondered what they were saying?

Well, we have no clue about that, but if you want a really funny and touching play about men and women in restaurants and bars looking for love and finding much more than they bargained for, then check out This is Not What I Ordered .

Press Reviews

"Mines the bottomless pit of male-female partnering."
— Los Angeles Weekly

"A startled deer in an SUV's headlights has nothing on these love-phobic characters. In the sure hands of a relationship-savvy playwright, an evening of charm and humor is bound to follow."
— Backstage West

Characters

Character	Gender	Age	Description
MAN 25-27, plays BRIAN, WAITER. The Cute Guy. He’s got that boyish thing down pat. But what does he want? He’s not sure. But he’s still afraid that he won’t get it.	male	25-27	25-27, plays BRIAN, WAITER. The Cute Guy. He’s got that boyish thing down pat. But what does he want? He’s not sure. But he’s still afraid that he won’t get it.
MAN 30-35, play LARRY, TOM. Character guy. Deeply insecure with women. He’s been burned many times, but he can’t keep himself from trying again.	male	30	30-35, play LARRY, TOM. Character guy. Deeply insecure with women. He’s been burned many times, but he can’t keep himself from trying again.
MAN 30-35, plays ALAN, STUART. Character guy. Also deeply insecure, but he goes in the other direction with it, feeling more resentful and suspicious of women, blaming them, not himself.	male	30	30-35, plays ALAN, STUART. Character guy. Also deeply insecure, but he goes in the other direction with it, feeling more resentful and suspicious of women, blaming them, not himself.
MAN 42, plays DOUG, SAM, BRUCE. An idealist who has tried his best to live up to his ideals. He hasn’t done badly either, except he doesn’t really know what he believes in anymore.	male	—	42, plays DOUG, SAM, BRUCE. An idealist who has tried his best to live up to his ideals. He hasn’t done badly either, except he doesn’t really know what he believes in anymore.
WOMAN 25, plays MELANIE, WAITRESS [CW]. She is an independent sort of girl. Does her best to cover up her vulnerability, but it’s there. Pretty without being a knockout, she’s aware that the odds are often against her. Feisty. Funny without trying to be.	female	—	25, plays MELANIE, WAITRESS [CW]. She is an independent sort of girl. Does her best to cover up her vulnerability, but it’s there. Pretty without being a knockout, she’s aware that the odds are often against her. Feisty. Funny without trying to be.
WOMAN 35, plays LINDA. Independent, but age is creeping up on her (or so she thinks). Getting a bit desperate for that right guy to come along. She’s got a real inner beauty, a poetic quality that guys seem not to know what to do with. (Can also be WAITRESS [CW]).	female	—	35, plays LINDA. Independent, but age is creeping up on her (or so she thinks). Getting a bit desperate for that right guy to come along. She’s got a real inner beauty, a poetic quality that guys seem not to know what to do with. (Can also be WAITRESS [CW]).
WOMAN 37, plays JOAN, ALISON. An attractive woman who sabotages herself at every turn, big time. This is close to a farcical character, a woman who just can’t help laying traps for herself. It would be terribly sad if it wasn’t so funny.	female	—	37, plays JOAN, ALISON. An attractive woman who sabotages herself at every turn, big time. This is close to a farcical character, a woman who just can’t help laying traps for herself. It would be terribly sad if it wasn’t so funny.
WOMAN 40, plays MEGAN, WAITRESS [WR]. Attractive, perhaps even a beauty, but not so guys seem really to notice anymore. She believed in many things once, had her share of adventures, but now her life has settled into an all too-placid routine.	female	40	40, plays MEGAN, WAITRESS [WR]. Attractive, perhaps even a beauty, but not so guys seem really to notice anymore. She believed in many things once, had her share of adventures, but now her life has settled into an all too-placid routine.